2012

This year I resolve...

...to not yell at my children.
...to remember that not everyone is comfortable with me nursing in public.
...to make school more fun.
...to put my husband's needs above my own.
...to exercise every day.
...to work on that filter between my brain and my mouth.
...to do better at keeping in touch with extended family.
...to stop procrastinating.
...to keep up with my blog, this includes updating the events I have missed.
...to be nice, even when people provoke me to be naughty.
...to stop using so many ellipses in my writing.
...to thank God more and take for granted less.
...to keep up with the laundry in my house.
...to not stress over muddy footprints on a clean kitchen floor.

Check back soon to see how I am doing with all of this... (<--- oops)

A Givens Christmas

C is for children. We believe that children are a blessing from God and He added another blessing this year. On November 16th, we welcomed Ezrah Ceal Givens into our family. He came here weighing 9 pounds 4 ounces and measuring 20 ¼ inches long. He has strawberry blonde hair and his daddy’s toes. He also already has us all wrapped around his little finger!

H is for home school. Yes we are doing that again this year. Noah is in the second grade, Jonah is in 3 year old preschool and Micah loves art (especially drawing on my walls).

R is for ranch…or maybe farm…or maybe just a backyard full of animals. At the time of the writing of this letter we are the caretakers of four turkeys, nine chickens, three rabbits, and one dog. The mix changes quite frequently, but the number of animals seems to keep going up and never down.

I is for independence. This year Noah attended his first summer camp, Jonah learned to ride a big boy bike, Micah mastered the “I can do it by myself” attitude, and even little Ezrah at less than a month old is already starting to support his own head. Each day they need a little less of us and grow closer to becoming the men we have been commissioned into raising them to be.

S is for sorrow. On April 27th our lovely Granny Faye left this earth for her heavenly home. We miss her every day but are so grateful for the times that we had with her. Most children don’t get to make such wonderful memories with a great grandparent and our boys are blessed that they knew her.

T is for train. For Noah’s birthday, he and I took a trip to DC. We boarded the train in Yemassee and rode up to DC spending two days exploring as many sights as we could pack into our short trip.

M is for monkeys. Jonah’s birthday trip was a weekend camping trip for the entire family, taking in Boo at the Zoo and a birthday party at Riverbanks Zoo. It was a perfect time to show off our family Halloween costume. We did a family theme of three little monkeys jumping on the bed. My mom made monkey costumes and Joe created a bed out of the kid’s wagon. I think it was the most fun our family has ever had with a Halloween costume.

A is for adjustment. We have had lots of adjusting to do this year, from losing a loved one to gaining a family member, but our family has grown closer with each adjustment we have had to make.

S is for our Savior. Everywhere I look I see blessings that I need to thank Him for. This Christmas season, I pray that you too will be able to look around and thank Him for the blessings in your life.

Introducing...

Our number four

 Ezrah Ceal Givens

9lbs. 4oz. of absolute perfection 

Born 11-16-11 at 8:44am 

And melting our hearts already!

Ezrah Ceal Givens

Dear Ezrah,

I can't believe that in just about 24 hours the time will come to meet you.  It feels like we have waited so long and at the same time it feels like the time has flown by since that first day I knew for sure that I was carrying you.

I knew before the test came back positive that you were growing inside me, and I loved you even then.  I remember taking a test every morning just waiting for the one that would show me some proof so that your father would believe me.  I'll never forget the morning of March 12th when I saw just the faintest of a second pink line.  I was thrilled and could not wait for your Daddy to get home from work.  Of course when he came in he went straight to the turkey and chicken pens to care for the animals.  Just to show you how excited I was, I ventured out there too so that I did not have to wait any longer to show him evidence of your pending arrival.  You will discover soon enough just how big that is for me.  (Your Mom is not a bird person!)  So yes, I announced you to your father while surrounded by chickens and turkeys.

After that, we told your Granny Faye that we were expecting you.  She was staying with us at the time and we knew it would be nearly impossible to keep it from her.  She was so excited to get to know you (even though she was sure you were a girl) but it was not to be.  God had other plans in the making and He took her home to be with Him just a few weeks after learning about you.  I grieved when we lost her, so much so that I was afraid that my grief was going to harm you.  I grieved for myself, but also for you too.  I so wanted you to experience your Great Grandmother, for she was a soul like no other.  It took me a while but I finally realized that you will still know her, just through my memories instead of your own.

As you grew inside me, I had aches and pains, but also moments of pure joy.  As I watched my body change to accommodate you and felt you thriving inside of me, my love for you grew.  Although I could do without you tap dancing on my bladder, I know that I am going to miss those little nudges that remind me that you are growing.  So tomorrow, after nine months of waiting...I get to see your face.  I get to look into your eyes and count your fingers.  I get to breathe in your sweet newborn smell and feel the weight of you in my arms.  I get to check out and see if you have the Godley nose and the Givens toes.  I get to finally meet you, and introduce you to this world that has been waiting for you.

The first person I'll introduce you to is your Daddy.  He may be more subdued with it, but his love for you is just as strong as mine.  You already know his voice from his early morning chats with you.  While I am sure you can't understand the words he uses, I know that you can hear the love in them.  In no time at all, he will have you riding off to work with him just like all of your older brothers.

Speaking of your older brothers, you will get to meet them too.  Your oldest brother Noah is the one who has been watching to make sure that I am eating right, reminding me to take my vitamins, and is constantly amazed at your little kicks and punches.  He sits patiently with his head on my tummy just waiting for a kick from you.

Your second oldest brother is Jonah.  You will know him by his incessant whistling.  He just turned four and is excited to teach you all the tricks he has learned in his extensive four years here on earth.  He plans to have you riding a bike by next week.

Micah is the brother that is closest to your age.  You will be taking his place as the baby, but I think he is ready to move on.  Micah is the one that has been jumping and climbing all over you for these past nine months.  You will have to give him a little time to get used to you because he has no experience being a big brother.  However, with the two great role models he has, I am sure he will catch on in no time.

So that is the family that you will be coming home with.  I sure hope you like us.  There are others as well...amazing grandparents, doting aunts, fun uncles, and playful cousins...but there will be plenty of time to meet them later.  You have a lot of love just waiting on you to get here.

Oh, there is One more that I can't wait to introduce you to; but then again He knows everything about you already.  He is the One who has given me the privilege of carrying you these past nine months and is giving me the extreme honor of raising you.  For I know that you as well as your brothers are just on loan from Him.  Our Heavenly Father has already entrusted me with the raising of three of his precious children and is now entrusting me with the care of another one.  How awesome is that?  I promise to do my best not to fail Him and to show you all the love that He has shown to me.

I'm so excited to meet you my precious little Ezrah.  Tomorrow can't get here soon enough.

Love,
Your Mommy

Milestones

Yes it is an important day in the Givens household.  Finally after four years, a monumental event has happened.  I'll tell you about it in Jonah's own words...

Guess what?  I can wipe my own butt now!

Keep in mind that he is very proud of this accomplishment and tells everyone he sees (even the UPS driver) about his new found independence. 
Now if we could only get Micah to attempt the potty.  Then we get to start all over with Ezrah.  Oh well, one step at a time I guess, and today we celebrate the small victory of Jonah wiping his own butt.

Hurricane Ezrah

Our house has been in a flurry of activity for the past few weeks.  We are trying to get everything ready for little Ezrah's arrival.  I have made ahead enough meals to last us for a month.  I have stocked up on supplies like toilet paper so that I do not have to go out for a while after the baby is born.  I have organized closets, disinfected walls, changed linens, and made sure all the dishes and laundry stayed caught up.  These are all things that I know will not happen again for quite some time after I get home from the hospital and recover from surgery.

I told Joe this morning that aside from filling the bathtubs with water so that we can flush the toilets, I feel as if I am going through our hurricane preparedness list all over again.  In a way we are.  We are preparing for Hurricane Ezrah to make his arrival next week!

Don't Ask Why!

Micah:  Mommy you know why I can run fast?

Me:  Why?

Micah:  'Cause I got gas in my butt!

Catching Up

It has been a while since I have been on here, over a month in fact.  Time just has a way of getting away from me.  I think about things all the time that I want to blog about, but just never get around to doing it.  I think face book has been my downfall.  I feel like I am still keeping in touch with everyone about the family, but I am not really getting to express it in a blogging style.  So that is my excuse, now for my catch up.  I figure since I don't sleep anymore anyway, I may as well blog during the middle of the night rather than lay there looking at the ceiling.

I announced a while back on here that our newest little addition was going to be a boy.  I said at that time that I would give a more detailed post about my feelings when I had time to get my thoughts together.  Well, seeing as we only have two weeks left before meeting said boy...I guess now is as good of a time as any.  Let me be perfectly clear, I am

OVER

THE

MOON

about raising another boy.  I was seriously having panic attacks at the thought of bringing home a baby girl.  Raising boys has become my life.  I believe that God intended all along for me to be a Mommy to boys...and it is the most fun ever!  I love seeing their smiles, hearing their laughter, and experiencing the world through eyes that see things so much differently than my own.  So yep, we are bringing home another boy...and are getting more and more excited every day!

The Difference Between Men & Women

Me: Joe have you seen my black cardigan?
Joe:  I don't know.  What does it look like?
Me:  It is a black cardigan.
Joe:  I heard you the first time...but what does it look like?

Mommy's Milk

Jonah: When Ezrah gets here what will he eat?
Me:  Actually he is not going to eat anything, he will drink my milk.
Jonah:  Why?
Me:  Because that is the very best milk for babies to drink.
Micah:  Then it must be chocolate!

Budding Artist

Me:  What happened to the wall?
Micah:  The marker draw on wall.
Me:  Who was holding the marker when it drew on the wall?
Micah: Me
Me:  Well, you are going to have to clean it all off.

...I proceed to give him a magic eraser...

Micah:  Oh man! Awesome! Cool!

...I come back several minutes later to find Micah drawing on another wall...

Me: What are you doing?
Micah: Need more marks on wall.

...I guess the punishment was a little too fun...

Learning

This was our first official week of school.  I have to admit that we did not get much done in the way of real schooling, (it was the first week after all) but it was a learning experience for all of us.  Here are just a few of the things that we learned.

1. Hummingbirds do not belong in the house.  Mom panics when one is flying around loose in there.
2. Craft beads do not belong up your nose.  Mom panics when that happens as well.
3. Artwork is for paper only.
4. Magic erasers really are magic for getting said artwork off of the walls, windows, doors, and television...but not off of children.
5. When it is over 100 degrees outside and you are covered in artwork, bathtub play is the best recess ever!

Hectic and crazy as it is, I love being able to experience all of these things with my children in our home school environment.

Haircuts

It was past time for haircuts at my house.  I dread haircuts....especially with Jonah.  We either have to take him out to a shop and run the risk of rude questions being asked about his skin, or cut his hair ourselves.  I am NOT a good barber.  You can ask any of my college roommates who I happened to practice on many years ago and they will verify my claim.  I fear I have not gotten any better as time as passed.
So that means that Joe is the official hair cutter around here.  This time around when he went to cut Jonah's hair, Jonah got upset and would not sit still for Joe to even make the first cut.  I could tell Joe was getting frustrated and so I asked Jonah what the problem was.  I knew he could not be scared of the scissors since this is certainly not the first time he has had Joe cut his hair.  Jonah responded with;

"I'm worried what it will look like when he gets done!"

I guess I am not the only one in this house lacking skills as a barber!!!!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

"If the traditional Rs (reading, writing, and arithmetic) are the basics that we want our children to master academically, then reverence, respect, and responsibility are the three Rs that our children need to master for the sake of their souls and the health of the world." ~Zoe Weil

I think of myself as a respectful person.  I try to teach my children respect.  I believe that the decline of society is directly related to the lack of respect that we show to those around us.

Why is this on my mind?

Today as I was driving home from town, I met a funeral procession.  I have heard that it is just a southern thing, but around here, cars pull over to the side of the road out of respect until the funeral procession has passed.  Today was no exception, and I pulled my van over to the side of the road.  As I sat there in my air conditioned van I used my time sitting on the side of the road to check my e-mails.  I glanced up into my mirror and saw that a gentleman had pulled over behind me, got out of his vehicle in 100 degree weather, removed his cap, and stood facing the procession with his hand over his heart.  His show of respect brought tears to my eyes and shame to my heart.

I may consider myself a respectful person, but obviously I have a long way to go.  I fear that I have fallen short of teaching my children the art of respect.  In my home I want to teach that people deserve respect not because of what they have or have not done, but simply because they are children of God and God has called us to love them.  For how can you truly love someone without respect?

Poison Control

Micah:  Want candy!
Me: No, you can't have any candy.  Go play in the toy room.
Micah:  Awwwwww

He wasn't happy with me but he did what I asked and went to go play (or so I assumed).  In the meantime, the older boys wanted to go to the shop where Joe was working.  I called Joe and stayed on the phone with him while the boys walked back to the shop.  When I was sure Joe had sight of Noah and Jonah, I hung up the phone and went in search of Micah.  I thought it strange that the door to the toy room was closed, and when I went to open it I could not.  Someone (Micah) had pushed the desk in front of the door blocking the entrance.  The boy's toy room is linked to their bedroom by an adjoining bathroom so I walked through their bedroom to enter the toy room another way.  As I got to the other door, I was greeted by Micah with a look of pure guilt all over his face.  I bent down to ask him about the door being blocked and I could smell grape candy very strong.

Me:  Have you been eating something?
Micah:  Yes
Me:  What did you eat?
Micah:  Candy
Me: Show me what you ate.

Micah leads me into the toy room and I see an empty box of Tylenol sitting in the corner.  It was the meltaways for children 6-12 and he had chewed through the paper backing to devour eight tablets.  I immediately picked up the phone and dialed poison control.  Having three boys, I sort of know the number by heart.

Poison Control:  This is Poison Control, how may I help you?
Me:  My two year old just ate half a box of Tylenol.
Poison Control:  'Mam what is your name, address, and telephone number?

Now I understand why they ask all of that stuff.  They need to know in case they have to send out an ambulance or in case we get disconnected...but I always feel like such a bad Mom as I am admitting who I am and what I have allowed my child to do.  I also wonder if they aren't secretly pulling up my file and saying, "Oh, it is her again!"

Anyway, turns out there is a rather large margin of error that is allowed when dosing out Tylenol and they told me that Micah was going to be just fine.  In the back of my mind I was sort of thinking that at least he (and we) would at least get a good night's sleep...but once again I was wrong.  Turns out that an overdose of Tylenol actually makes a two year old hyper.  He did not go to sleep until after midnight and was wide awake at six the next morning.

As for poison control, I am really glad they are there.  It saved me from a trip to the ER just to calm my nerves and assure me that my child was going to be fine.

We Are Having A Boy!

Boys are found everywhere -- on top of, underneath, inside of, climbing on, swinging from, running around or jumping to. Mothers love them, little girls hate them, older sisters and brothers tolerate them, adults ignore them and Heaven protects them. A boy is Truth with dirt on its face, Beauty with a cut on its finger, Wisdom with bubble gum in its hair and the Hope of the future with a frog in its pocket. ~Alan Marshall Beck


I'm happy to announce that we are having boy number four!  A more detailed post will follow when I get my thoughts in order...but for now I will just let you know that we are thrilled that God is blessing us with another little boy to call our own.

Sand Angels

We do not get much snow here in the south, so we make do with sand.  What kid does not like making angels in the sand while waiting on the fireworks show to start?

Airplanes & Boats

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child.

There are seven million.

~Walt Streightiff~

Lands End 4th

As we are a pretty young family we do not have many traditions yet.  However, one tradition that we do have is July 4th at Lands End.  I have spent July 4th at Lands End for the past fifteen years and I hope we are able to be there with our little family for many years to come.

There truly is nothing like it.  We spend our long holiday laying in the sun, splashing in the surf, gathering candy at the parade, smelling the salt air, eating bushels of fresh seafood, porpoise viewing, watching sunsets over the water, enjoying fireworks across the ocean, scratching bug bites, taking long naps, gathering conch shells, spitting watermelon seeds, fighting over the last spoonful of Mom's macaroni salad, playing with fiddler crabs, burning food on the grill, taking moonlit walks on the beach, feeling the sea breeze, and sitting on the deck with family and friends.
Sure there is always fussing about the kids being too loud and juggling bathroom schedules with so many people in one house, but our Lands End 4th is still my favorite family tradition.  What is yours?

Camp Awards

They gave out several awards at camp this week.  There was most athletic (boy and girl), camp clown (boy and girl), most talented (boy and girl), honor camper, camp king, camp queen, and best christian character (boy and girl).  Of the eleven awards given, Noah won best christian character.  We couldn't have been prouder!  Congratulations Noah!

Life Lessons From Summer Camp

This was our first time ever doing summer camp.  My kids have never spent the night away from home with anyone other than my parents, so I was unsure if we would even make it the entire week, but I was pleasantly surprised.  Noah was the only one old enough to go to camp and while I was working at the camp, I was coming home each night to stay with the little ones.  Noah stayed all week by himself and really had a great time.
For our first year of doing camp we had 30 children, only seven of which were girls.  If you do the math you can figure out that it was a very loud, dirty, testosterone filled week!  My official title was dean of camp.  That meant I dealt with all of the discipline problems with the staff and campers.  My first morning back at the camp I was greeted by the director who informed me that we had a counselor walk out in the middle of the night without informing anyone (leaving an entire cabin of boys alone all night long) and that there was a suspected case of lice.  I really wanted to just turn around, get back into my van, and head home; but I can honestly say those were our only major issues of the week and they were resolved quickly.
I expected the kids to learn quite a bit at camp, but I did not realize what an education it would be for me as well.  Here are some of my lessons learned...

1. Pranking is "da bomb".
2. When a child says he needs a tissue, don't ask what for because he will surely show you.
3. It is possible for kids to go an entire week without sleep if they are supplied with the proper mix of caffeine and sugar.

All in all I can say it was a good experience for everyone and we are already excited about doing it again next year!

Not So Nice

I remember when Joe and I had been married for just a few months and I had recently found out I was pregnant with Noah.  Mom and I were shopping one day and she made the remark that either marriage or pregnancy agreed with me because I had "mellowed" considerably and was a much nicer person.  I actually agreed with her.  I am not sure if it was the married life or the pregnancy, but I was getting along with people better and was doing a phenomenal job of rolling with the punches.

I am thinking now that it must NOT have been the pregnancy, because this time around things are a whole lot different!  Comments that used to roll right off my back are now met with not so nice responses and the filter between my brain and my mouth has gone on strike.   For example...

Monday afternoon I had to stop at my mother-in-law's house on my way into town to do some shopping.  The kids were behaving like little horrors and I explained their behavior by saying that they were tired and would probably sleep all the way to town.  To this she replied, "Well, I hope you aren't planning on just leaving them in the car while you do your shopping!"  Ummm, yeah...I don't think she will ever say that again.

Then later in the week, Joe and I were discussing truck business and he was telling me about something that he needed done two days before and I was trying to explain that sometimes dealing with the Department of Transportation takes more time than I have and he said, "Well you only work one day a week, I don't see why you can't get it done."  Once again, that is something that I don't think he will ever say to me again.

Those are just two of many examples of the snappy irritable person that I have become. Maybe it is the pregnancy, maybe it is the heat, maybe it is just because I am getting old.  Whatever is causing it, I will be glad when I find my inner niceness again.  Although I am sure that I will not be nearly as glad as my family and friends.

Why I Pay The Bills

I have heard that in some marriages the husband and wife sit down together each week, balance the checkbook, and pay the bills.  Ummmm....that is not the way it works in our house!  Basically in our home, Joe makes the money and I spend it.  Well not exactly, but to some looking from the outside in that is the way that it seems.
The truth is that Joe does bring in most of the income into our home, and I send most of it right back out.  While our small business is a joint venture, it is his job to see that we are making money.  My job is to see that we are doing it legally by paying bills, cutting through red tape, and keeping up with ever changing rules and regulations.  We each have our own responsibilities that line up with our individual strengths.  For example, if I were in charge of driving a truck or managing the drivers we would not have any trucks or drivers left.  The trucks would be in a ditch somewhere, and I would never be able to put up with the whining that Joe puts up with from some of our drivers.
So, we stick to what we do best...for the most part.  Sometimes one of us has to handle something that is the other one's responsibility.  That happened this weekend.  Joe had some outside labor come in to help with some mechanic work and they needed to be paid in cash.  I was not aware that we had outside laborers coming in and was not prepared with cash.  I had two sick ones at home so I asked Joe to go to the little corner store and use their ATM to get cash.
Let me say here that while Joe is great at many things, there are two things that he is not good with.  The first is finance and the second is technology.  Combine them together and it is almost always a disaster.  I knew this, but thought that if I gave him explicit instructions that surely an ATM could not be that hard to figure out.

1. Insert and remove card
2. Select business account
3. Select checking
4. Enter your PIN
5. Enter the amount you need
6. Agree to the charge
7. Collect your money and receipt

The ATM at the corner store charges a $2.95 fee for the use of the machine.  On top of that our bank charges $2.00 for using a machine that is not theirs. 
About fifteen minutes after Joe had left to go to the store he called me and was rather upset.  He said, "Do you realize how much it is going to cost to get $200.00 out of this machine?"  I told him that I understood but I thought that $4.95 was not bad considering that we had no other choice.  This is what I can remember of our conversation after that:

Joe: Yeah but that is for each time I use the machine.  Do you know how many times I will have to use it to get to $200.00?
Me: What are you talking about, you only have to use it once!
Joe: No, it says to enter the amount you wish to withdraw in denominations of $20.00.  I can only get $20.00 at a time.  Do you know how many times that is?
Me: AAAAKKKK!  That is not what it means!  How many times have you used it already?
Joe: Once, what do you mean that is not what it means?
Me: It means that the machine only stocks twenty dollar bills, so you can't withdraw an amount that requires tens or fives.
Joe: Oh, never mind then.

So that is why I pay the bills and Joe handles the trucks!

MIA

I have been missing in action recently, although not quite as long as some people (*cough*...HOLLY).  We really haven't had anything exciting going on here, but I still like to post just to remind myself of what was going on since at my advanced age I can't seem to remember anymore.  By the way that was the answer to my exhaustion question...I'm just old.  The doctor could not find anything wrong with me save for the fact that I am pregnant (with ONLY one baby), have three little ones at home, and of course am getting older.

I am trying to decide whether to find out if this little one is a boy or a girl.  I was adamantly opposed to it when I first got pregnant, but am beginning to be swayed by all those around me that want to know.  They make good points, and I am not sure what I will do yet.  The three other ladies I know that are delivering around the same time have recently found out that they are all having girls...that scares me a bit!  My next ultrasound is the second week of July so we shall see how I feel that day!

School is out for Summer, but Noah is still seeing a reading tutor.  A few nights ago I caught him reading a book (gasp) all because he wanted to!  Getting him excited about reading has been by far my biggest challenge and I am excited to see progress in that area.

This week starts our busy season for the Summer.  Our first round of  VBS , followed by a week of summer camp (our first time doing this...sure to be a interesting experience), then 4th of July at the river, one week off, followed by one more round of VBS, and then school starts again.

Where did the carefree days of summer go?

Redneck Rescue Ranger

Give him some duct tape and a coat hanger and he can fix anything.

He never passes up anyone in distress.

A heart so big, I wonder how it fits inside his chest.

A loving father and devoted husband.

My rock and my safe place to fall all rolled into one.

Happy Birthday to my very own Redneck Rescue Ranger.

I love you My Joseph.

Man At The Window

Tonight I put the boys to bed a little later than usual since they had all taken late naps.  Jonah and Micah had been in bed for about 30 minutes and Noah was still up enjoying some Lego time without little ones crawling all over him.  Joe and I were watching the History channel, and I could hear the younger boys still playing quietly in their beds and had already gone in twice to tell them to go on to sleep.  It was a little after 9:00 when Jonah came out of their bedroom saying that there was a man knocking on his window.  I told him that I was sure there was not and that he needed to go on back to bed and go to sleep.  As I was convincing him to go back to bed, Micah came out of their bedroom saying, man-knock-my-window.  I scolded Jonah for putting ideas into his younger brother's head, took them each by the arm and lead them back to their bedroom.

As I entered the bedroom I heard a noise at the window. I turned to look and there at the window was a light skinned black man with a beard and ball cap, staring back at me.  I let out a scream that I did not even know I had in me and Joe came running.  I'm not sure what I even told him but he went outside to see what was going on.

Turns out it was a man who was looking for Joe to do some hauling for him.  He said he had knocked on the door and no one came, so he went to a window that had some light shining in it to try and get someone.  Are you kidding me?  What person in their right mind goes to a business owner's home, on a holiday, after nine at night, and knocks on their windows, in order to ask them a question about their business?  Our phone numbers are listed everywhere...why not just pick up the phone and call?  If I have anything to say about it (and I am pretty sure I will) we will not be doing any hauling for this man at any time.

After I had recovered from my own near heart attack, I then had to have a heart to heart with my children about safety without scaring them senseless.  They now know that they did the exact right thing by coming to me and that Mommy will definitely listen from this point forward.  They went right to sleep after I had prayed with them, but I have a feeling I will be up for quite a while longer.

Melissa, if you are reading this, I now understand why you do not sleep with your windows open.  I honestly had never even given it any thought.  We live in the country, away from all of the city crazies and crime.  I don't even have a key to the lock on my door and we have always slept with our windows open every time the weather would allow.  After tonight's episode, I am rethinking my stance on that very issue!

Exhaustion

I have never in my life been as tired as I am these days.  Not even when I had mono last summer did I feel like this.  Yesterday I managed to get up, get a shower, and get clothes on but by lunch time I was wiped out.  My wonderful husband told me to go take a nap...I slept for nearly six hours.  He woke me up so that we could go to a graduation party.  After two hours at the party I was so tired that I felt like weeping.  We came home and I went straight to bed.  Joe decided that we were skipping church this morning so that I could get extra rest while he was at home to watch the boys.  I am typing this from my bed this morning.
I am tired of sleeping, but still don't feel rested.  I really don't think this is normal.  I am past the first trimester of this pregnancy, so I don't think this is pregnancy related.  I see my OBGYN on Tuesday, so maybe he will be able to provide some insight.  Anyone else ever experienced this?

Mission Accomplished

Noah and I went to DC the first part of last week.  It was a very quick trip and we packed in as much as possible.  It was a great time for both of us and gave us some much needed one on one time with each other.  We learned new things, saw new sights, and made lots of memories....but those were not the reasons we took this trip.

The world that my children live in is really small.  I'm not sure if it is because we are a homeschooling family, a small business owning family, a living in the woods family, or a combination of all three.  Part of that is by design.  I want to protect them from all of the bad in the world and allow them to be innocent children for as long as possible.  On the other hand, I do not want them to believe that their lives have to always revolve around back-woods living and trucking.  I want them to know that there is a whole 'nother world out there just waiting for them to explore when they are properly equipped to deal with it.  There are wonderful parts to this wicked world that we live in and it is okay to dream about experiencing them.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not saying that I want them to dream of "more".  Personally I do not think there is anything "more" that I could add to the life that we have chosen to make me any happier.  I just want them to know that it is okay to desire "different". 

While we were in DC Noah saw many things that amazed him.  At one point he turned to me and asked if we could live there.  I explained to him that no, we could not live there because my home was with his Daddy back in SC.  He thought about that for a while and then said, well do you think that maybe when I grow up someday I could live here?


Mission Accomplished.

Mirror Image

There are some things as a Mother that I find myself saying that I never would have imagined coming out of my mouth before having children.  There are also some things that come out of my children's mouths that I never expected to hear as well.  Take tonight for instance.  We all went out to eat as a family.  As we were sitting around the table waiting on our meals, Jonah looks at Joe and out of nowhere says, "Are you really my Daddy?"
I was sitting there with my mouth hanging open, trying to come up with a response when Joe just as quickly responds, "Well son, that is what your Mom tells me."  Sometimes Joe's sense of humor makes me want to kick him, but that is not the point here.
As I was trying to figure out where the question had come from, I realized that we were sitting directly across from a large mirror.  From where Jonah was sitting he had a direct view of Joe's reflection.  He was trying to figure out if his Daddy was the man sitting beside him or the reflection he saw in front of him.
It gave us a good laugh, but also made me very thankful for the choices that Joe and I have made in our lives.  It sure makes the answer for the "who is my Daddy" question a whole lot simpler than the answer that some mothers have to come up with.

Seriously?

Saturday I was helping to host a baby shower from three to five and then as a family we were supposed to attend a fundraising dinner at my Mom's church.  I left Jonah and Noah with Joe at the shop while Micah and I went to the baby shower.  The plan was for Micah and I to go straight from the baby shower to the fundraising dinner and have Joe, Jonah, and Noah meet us there.
I called Joe when I left the shower just to make sure everything was still on track.  He told me that he was still working and needed me to come pick up the boys, just to bring him back a plate of food.  I said that was fine, just to have the boys ready to go when I got there since I would be running late.  Then the conversation went something like this...

Joe:  Do the kids need to be dressed up for this?
Me:  No, shorts and tee-shirts are fine.
Joe:  So they can go like they are?
Me:  Yeah, what they had on earlier is fine.
Joe:  Ummm, if you say so.

Now Joe has never been one to care about appearances so I should have been clued in to what I was about to witness, but I was in such a hurry that it went right over my head.  This is what greeted me when I arrived at the shop.

 SERIOUSLY????  Let me point out to you that they were NOT covered in dirt or mud.  Nope, it was axle grease!  Ugh, the joys of having boys...Joe included.

Coastal Boy

Noah: Mom don't you wish we could spend every day at the beach?

Me:  That would be nice.  I am thankful that we get to come to the beach as often as we do.  Do you realize that there are some people who go their entire lives without seeing the beauty of the ocean?

Noah:  Man that would be horrible to never get to play in marsh mud!

I Should Pay More Attention

Jonah:  Mom can I go outside and brush Dixie's hair?

Me: Go ahead, but don't go out the gate.

Jonah: Okay, I won't.


.....later.....


Jonah:  I remembered to put your hairbrush back, are you proud of me?

Thank You

Those two words do not even seem adequate for the support that we as a family have received over the past week.  The amount of phone calls, e-mails, cards, visits, food, and flowers were overwhelming.

Just take a look at all of those flowers!  And that does not even count all of the many house plants that were received.  Granny Faye was truly loved by all that knew her, and she loved each of you in return.

The most important thing that our family has received this past week have been your prayers.  I can only speak for myself, but I know that I would have never made it through some of those tough moments had it not been for the prayers of loving Christians.  Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart!

Osama Bin Laden

“I’ve never wished a man dead. But, I have read some obituaries with great pleasure.” – Mark Twain

I'm still not really sure how I feel about the death of Bin Laden.  I for sure do not feel like taking to the streets in celebration. Watching Americans celebrate and cheer last night after the news was announced made me sick to my stomach.  I think that just coming from the recent loss of my Grandmother, I am looking at this from a different perspective than most.

Bin Laden was a horrible, wicked, evil man who for sure deserved death for the crimes that he committed.  However, to rejoice in any death gives me pause.  I am sure that he was loved by someone, somewhere, and for me to gloat and cheer in the face of that tragedy just does not seem even human.

I am a firm believer that sin is sin no matter what kind it is.  God views each transgression against him the same.  Bin Laden's life was riddled with sins against God.  Because of that I feel confident that he went straight from that palace directly into the pits of Hell.  I think that it is important to remember though that but for the grace of God, when I die I would be headed there as well.

How can I rejoice in his suffering when I know that I myself deserve the same punishment that he is receiving? Christ died for Bin Laden's sins just as much as he died for mine.  The difference is that I chose to receive the gift.  That is where I find the only rejoicing in this situation.

By the way, feel free to disagree with me.  I am not an expert on anything...it is just my opinion!

Feel The Love

Jonah: Daddy, I have something to tell you.
Joe: Go ahead Jonah.
Jonah: It is really important.
Joe:  Well go ahead, I am listening.
Jonah:  I love you.
Joe:  I love you too.


...long pause...

Me: Jonah do you have something to tell me?
Jonah:  Ummmm....no.

The Process

I know that grief is a process.  I know there are different stages and that we all experience them differently.  My head knows all that junk, but my heart still hurts. 

The hurt is changing though.  Not sure if it is any better or worse, just changing.  Wednesday it was all just too much.  It was too real.  I could not get the image of her taking those last breaths out of my head.  The fact that she was talking one minute and then gone the next kept playing in my mind over and over.  I was in no mood for company Wednesday.  I actually came home, parked behind the house, locked the doors and unplugged the phone.  I spent the afternoon loving on my babies and drawing comfort from them.

Thursday was the opposite.  Just as the day before had been too real, Thursday felt surreal.  I went through the motions of viewing her body for the first time, helping with funeral arrangements, and picking out flowers all while on autopilot.  It was busywork, and while there were still moments when my emotions overtook, for the most part they were on the backburner.

Friday morning was about the boys.  I took them early to view Granny's body in private.  They had questions and I answered them the best I could.  Noah understands completely and Jonah understands as well, he just keeps asking questions. Little Micah has no idea what has happened.  I just pray that somewhere in that smart mind of his he has buried memories of Granny for future years.  Friday evening was the visitation.  Nearly 300 people showed up to pay their respects.  It was wonderful to see how loved Granny was and how many lives she had touched.

Today was our final goodbye.  The church was full and the ceremony was beautiful.  She would have loved every minute of it.  I know she is rejoicing. After the ceremony and lunch we all came back to the house and took a LONG nap.  Grief is an exhausting thing.  My heart aches that she is gone, but I am happy for her.  I know she is rejoicing.

I ask myself now if I had the option to bring her back, what would I do?  I know the answer should be an easy no, but I am just not there yet.  I feel so guilty, but the truth is that I would bring her back in a heartbeat.  I still need her and I feel as if I will forever miss her.

Grief

I can't sleep.  I keep thinking about Granny and how much I miss her.  I am thinking about my brother and his wife half a world away and how much I just want to give them a hug...how much she would want to give them a hug.  I wonder how I will ever make it without her.  I hate that my boys are missing her and that Noah climbed into her bed tonight and cried himself to sleep.  I never imagined it would be this hard, yet at the same time I would not change one minute over the past few months.  I am so glad that we were able to take care of Granny and that the boys got to experience her in a way that most children never get to experience their Great-Grandparents.  I pray that they always keep memories of waking up in the middle of the night and sneaking into Granny's bed for a snuggle.  I am grieving that our newest babe will never know that privilege.
My Granny was an interesting, one of a kind, sassy, lady.  You never had to wonder what she thought of you because there was absolutely no filter between her brain and her mouth.  It sounds harsh, but it was actually refreshing and I think she had so many friends because of that.  She put me in my place many times, and I can't help but wonder who will do that now.  Watching her go today was probably one of the hardest things I have ever done.  I wanted so badly to call a time out and just make time stand still.  I wasn't ready.  I don't think I would have ever been ready.  But today was not about me being ready it was about her...and I know that she was ready.  She is rejoicing now, but I am still grieving.  I miss her.  I selfishly want her back.  I still need her.
Oh what a joy it would have been tonight for her to call me to change the channel for her so she could watch her Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.  We would have talked about Vanna's dress and she would have fussed at me for using Mrs. Dash in her food.  She would have loved on the kids and loaded them up with chocolate candy that she was not even supposed to have.  As much as I would like that, I know that she would not come back even if she could and it is insanely selfish of me to even want her to.
I can't help it.  I miss her.  I can't stop crying.  It feels like a part of my chest is missing.  I really did not know that it would be this hard.  Aside from my mother and my husband, I don't think that anyone on this earth knew me better than my Granny.  And now that person is gone.  I'm sure over the next few days things will get easier, but right now I am the selfish person that wants to bring her back.

Redneck Life

Need I say more?

Got Grass?

Potty training a boy is such an interesting experience.  Jonah has really taken to wearing big boy underwear and is doing great.  He is even staying dry through the night.  He LOVES to pee outside and the first thing he usually does when he wakes up is to run out the back door and relieve himself...hey, whatever works!  Once he made up his mind to potty train it has been so easy. 
This past Friday was our first full day in town running errands since he had been out of diapers.  We were in town from about 10:00 that morning  until 4:30 that afternoon.  That meant that Jonah had to use public restrooms without the potty insert (for his tiny hiney) that we use at home.
I thought for sure that we were in trouble after the first two bathroom stops that we made.  Jonah told me he had to go, but when we got into the bathroom both times he just could not seem to pee.  Our third stop it was obvious that he really had to go, but once again he tried and said, "I just can't."  When I asked if running some water in the sink would help he said, "No 'Mam, I just need some grass!"
We finally found a small patch of grass behind Wendy's that I could shield him from the view of traffic and he could relieve himself.  My Grandmother thought it was horrible that he had to have grass in order to pee, but I told her it could have been worse.  He could have asked for a fire hydrant!

Happy Passover

I really hope this does not offend anyone.  I thought it was too funny!

Love and Marriage

We had a young married couples dinner and seminar at church last night.  It was really good, we learned a lot and had tons of laughs with each other.  One of the exercises we did required us to write on an index card one thing that we did not like about our spouse.  We were to write down that one thing that drove us crazy and then turn our card over so that no-one else saw what we wrote.
Of course I knew immediately what annoyed me the most about Joe so I quickly wrote it down, turned my card over and put my pen down.  When I looked at Joe, I saw him sitting there staring at his blank card in front of him.  I felt guilty that I had come up with a negative item about him so quickly and here he was still trying to think of something negative about me.  I leaned over and put my arm around him and whispered, "It is so sweet that you are having such a hard time with this."  To which he replied, "Well he said just one thing and I'm having trouble narrowing it down!"

Baby Givens

Baby Givens "saw" the doctor for the first time today and got a clean bill of health.  So far everything is progressing nicely.  My actual due date is November 19th, but because this will be a repeat cesarean he or she will be here earlier than that...probably on the 13th, but depending on the hospital schedule that could change.
I am feeling so excited.  Although I am having quite a bit of nausea, I am loving every minute of this pregnancy.  I am sure that November will be here before I can blink and I will wonder where the time went, so I am trying to enjoy every day that this baby is still growing inside me.

Did Not

My two year old did not walk all the way from our backyard and nearly a quarter of a mile down the main road to the neighbors house unnoticed by either of his parents.  There is certainly no way that he did it while wearing only a diaper.  Joe and I are much too responsible for that.  We know who is watching each of our children at all times and never lose track of any of them.

My seven year old did not inform me that my two year old was standing in the middle of the road while I was sitting on my neighbors front porch visiting.  I did not start screaming like a lunatic and trample the neighbor's flower beds trying to get to him when I realized that said two year old must have followed the seven year old and I as we walked to the neighbor's house earlier.

My husband did not calmly say, "Oh, I thought you knew he decided to go with you" when I called him to tell him what happened.  It did not take emptying my stomach contents and nearly an hour to stop shaking.

Nope, none of this happened today.  I refuse to believe it.

Bees

One of our bee hives swarmed today into the top of our Magnolia tree.

We gathered the supplies necessary to get it down.

A ladder, saw, and an empty hive box to put them in.

First I climbed the ladder to get a picture of the bees before Joe moved them. 

Then I locked myself in the Pathfinder with the kids while Joe cut the branch.

It took him about three trips to get the entire swarm. 

 This is just part of the swarm. 

After the swarm was taken care of we decided to do a little housekeeping with the bees.  This is the bottom side of the top board in a hive.  All of the comb and honey is not supposed to be there, so we raked it off and the kids got their bellies full!

They said it was yummy, but personally I do not really like honey, so I refrained.  We were able to gather enough extra bees to fill our observation hive.  I have been wanting to put one in the house for the longest time and it looks like that will happen soon.  If the queen starts laying, then we will be able to move it.  I'll post pictures as soon as it is ready!

By the way, did you know that the only true way to tell if you are allergic to bees is to get stung and see if you have a reaction?  We now know for sure that Joe, myself, and Noah are not allergic.   Jonah and Micah have yet to be "tested".

Number Four!

Pride

Okay, I know that pride cometh before a fall, but I just have to brag on two of my guys a little bit.

First Joe.  I recently posted about some of the events that have transpired since our fire in January.  Joe and I have gotten all sorts of advice as to how to handle the situation, most of the advice being along the lines of suing and getting "everything you can get."  Joe and I were never comfortable with that idea, yet we knew that we needed to recoup our losses somehow.  The very same day that I posted the fire update on my blog, I was contacted by the property owners next door.  They wanted access to our property to take pictures and examine the damage for themselves.  I let them in the gate and they looked over everything.  They wanted to speak with Joe directly so that evening when he got off of work we went over and met with them.
To make a long story short, Joe told them that he was willing to work together to get things fixed and that we were not out to ruin anyone over an accident.  I was so proud of the way my husband let go of his pride and was able to calmly deal with the situation.  I do believe that God worked in their hearts as well as ours so that we could resolve this issue.  We worked out an agreement that is suitable for everyone and the repairs should start the end of April.  I think the most important outcome is that Joe and I walked away with a clear conscience and feeling that our Christian testimony was still intact.

Now on to the second guy that I am going to brag on.  We ran out of diapers Sunday and Jonah has taken to wearing big boy underwear like a champ!  He has only had two accidents and we are already on day four!  We ended up putting Micah back in diapers yesterday because he just is not quite ready, but Jonah is on a roll.  I am so proud of my big boy for finally getting out of diapers!

So there you go.  That is what I have to be proud of today.  I hope that tomorrow the neighbors do not back out of their agreement and Jonah does not go back to peeing in his pants.  Just maybe this one time, a fall will not follow my pride!

Overheard

Potty training two boys at one time is not really going as well as I had hoped, but it does provide for some great entertainment.  For instance Jonah (who will not go near the potty) was trying to tell Micah how to poop in the potty.  It went something like this:

Micah, soon you are gonna be wearin big boy underwear...not diapers.  You know what you gotta do when you wear big boy underwear?  You gotta pee outside.  Then, when you have to poop, you gotta do it on the potty.  First you sit on the potty and then you poop.  But you gotta take off your underwear first.  I hope you don't fall in!  Hehehehehe! You get the poop out like this.  You squeeeeeze your butt and the poop comes right out.  But my poop only goes in diapers, cause I don't wanna wear those underwear.

Just an FYI...both boys are still in diapers and at this rate will be until they turn eighteen.

Spring In The South

I love springtime in the South.  There is nothing quite like opening the windows and letting the fresh breeze blow through the house.  There are some things however I could do without...

This is what happens when the springtime breeze blows southern pine pollen all throughout your house.

  Ugh...the cleanup begins!

Fire Update

Remember that fire we had the end of January?  Although I am still grateful that things worked out so that we did not lose everything and that no one was seriously injured, I can't help but be a little upset about the way that things have progressed since then.  Our neighbor lady and the guy who apparently set the fire (privacy fence neighbor lady's 40 year old nephew) never came over to help us get the fire out, nor did they call to make amends.  They did not even bother to call and see if everyone was okay when the ambulance pulled up into my yard.
Even though the fire department and Joe got the fire out before it completely engulfed our old house, it still managed to do quite a bit of damage beforehand.  The guy who set the fire had to go to court the first of March to pay his fine for setting a fire during the period that there was a ban on burning because of weather conditions.  We were told to come to court that day as well with an estimate to repair the damages.  We got a contractor to come out and give us an estimate. (Which was a lot higher than I thought it would be but then again I was looking at the surface and not taking into consideration all of the things that were deemed no longer safe by the fire marshal) When we got to court, the guy told the judge that he lived with his Aunt rent free, had recently gotten out of prison, and did not have any source of income.  He did not even have enough money to pay his $100 fine.  The judge advised us to get a lawyer and sue him and his Aunt (the property owner) for the amount of the damages. 
That really was not what I wanted to hear.  I have never sued anyone for anything and I'm really not sure how I feel about it.  After court that day, Joe and I drove over to the neighbor lady's house and spoke with both her and her nephew.  Joe asked the nephew if he would be willing to physically help out with the repairs and maybe we could just resolve this peacefully.  The nephew said (paraphrasing here because I was so shocked I can't remember his exact words) that he did not have to do anything, we needed to take it to court and let the courts decide the outcome.  He said the worst thing they could do to him was to lock him up and he had been through that already and it wasn't so bad!
Really???  Now I know that this guy did not intentionally set our house on fire...at least I would hope not.  It was a mistake, and while I do not think that his life should be ruined over a mistake, I do think that there should be some consequences.  So the question I keep coming back to is whether or not the $100 fine is enough of a consequence for him, and whose place is that to decide?  I don't know who gets the benefit from the fine.  I would hope that it goes to the firefighters who dropped everything they were doing that day to come out and help us.
We did go see a lawyer who sent them a letter asking for the home owner's insurance information.  So far they have not responded to that.  For now, Joe has put up heavy plastic over the windows and door to prevent any further damage from the elements, but we have not started any other repairs.
As a Christian, where is the balance between demanding restitution from someone who has wronged you and letting them walk all over you?

Pure Joy

Get Ready...

Get Set...



Go...

   

Give Mom A Heart Attack!



Laying Down The Law

This little boy has been getting away with anything he wants for far too long!  Some days I feel like our entire house revolves around Jonah.

Poor thing, it really isn't his fault.  His father and I have allowed it to happen and now we have to put it to an end.  I think for me it all started when I was pregnant with Jonah and was so scared that something was wrong with him.  Then when he was born and demanded so much from us, it just seemed normal to keep giving even when it was no longer required.  So if you are local, you soon will see us putting our foot down when it comes to Jonah.  I am sure it will not be pleasant on either end, but it has to be done and preferably sooner than later.
I put this on here to remind myself of the necessity of training him up the way that he should go...because when he wraps those little arms around my neck and holds on tight, all I want to do is give in and give him the world!

Expanding

Our back yard is turning into a barn yard.  We are now the proud caretakers of one dog (Dixie Jane), two bunnies (Dr. Sparkles and Jose), four turkeys (Tom, Gerry, Jessie, and Ginny), and seven chickens (one rooster and six hens - no names yet).

I say we only have two bunnies, but we recently moved Dr. Sparkles (female) into Jose's (male) cage and let them get married. 

Dr. Sparkles really likes watermelon!

Jose...isn't he just the cutest thing?

The newlyweds....Mr. and Mrs. Jose H. Givens.

Expecting

We had Micah's birthday celebration here a few weeks ago.

We had chili and cornbread,

and a baseball cake.

Micah enjoyed opening presents,

but still managed to give us a few classic "2 year old attitude" poses.

It is a well known fact that Micah was born exactly nine months after my Mom and her husband kept Noah and Jonah overnight for Joe and I to have some alone time.  Since then every time we go on a date there is endless teasing.  We decided that on Micah's second birthday it was time to turn the tables. 

As soon as all of the family arrived, Joe and I stood side by side in the kitchen and asked to have every one's attention.  I put my arm around him and said, "I'm sure all of you know that two years and nine months ago Mom and Pa kept Noah and Jonah for Joe and I to have a date....and here we are celebrating Micah's second birthday.  I'm sure most of you know as well that they kept all three boys for us to go on a date a for valentines day, and now I want you to know that WE ARE EXPECTING.......you all to have as much fun today as we had on that date!

The looks on their faces were priceless!  I think it may have been the best joke I have ever pulled off.  Most of them were so shocked that I said we were expecting that they did not even hear the rest of the sentence.  Ahhh, fun times!

Micah

Throwing balls, blowing kisses, and pinching strangers.

Eating dog food, digging holes, and playing in the mud.

Boot loving, truck driving, and stick wielding.

You fit into our family perfectly, blue eyes and all.

We wouldn't have you any other way.

Happy Birthday to our new two year old!  We love you!

Scorched

Between our house and the shop we have a little patch of pines that have been there since Joe bought the property.  I love looking out the window every morning and feeling like I truly am waking up in the forest.  I know it sounds corny but it is nice to look out and see trees rather than dirt, asphalt, or another building.  I mean, I would take a beach or mountain view any day, but since I do not have those right outside my back door, I enjoy the woods.

See what I mean?  It is a lovely view (as long as I don't let myself think too long about what types of critters live in, around, and under those trees).  Unfortunately during the course of the fire a few weeks ago some of our trees were left scorched.

The entire row of trees next to the shop drive were scorched and now their needles are turning brown and falling off. Joe says that he does not know if they will survive or not. We will have to wait and see and may end up having to cut that row. I am hoping that they will live because I really do enjoy my view of the trees!

Now just as springtime is getting here and everything else is turning nice and green, when I look up from under my trees all I see is brown...

...when I should be seeing green.

The really interesting part (to me) is that the trees did not start turning until more than a week after the fire.  I woke up one morning and was shocked to see that they were dying.  I called Joe to the window to show him that our trees were dying and he said, "Denise, do you not remember the fire?"  Well of course I remembered the fire, but it had not even touched the trees and I had no idea that just the heat alone from the fire would do that much damage to our trees. 

As I was pondering the fate of our trees another thought came to me.  Just as that fire did damage to our trees that it did not even touch how much so does sin that is just between one person and God do damage to others around whom it seems it has not even touched.  And just as the damage to our trees did not show up until later, how long will it be before the damage from sin rears it's head in those other people?

Anyway, that is my deep thought for the year...